Take a minute to ask yourself, would you still be doing what you are doing right now even if it meant you do not get the handsome payoff, arrival or ‘I’ve made it’ moment that you’ve been hoping for? The key to finding happiness and contentment in your life right now is to be grateful for right now, even when things get difficult.
Stop Putting False Promise On A Pedestal
The promise of false arrival is something that everyone struggles with, and if you find yourself in the mindset of ‘I will be happy when I achieve this thing’, you need to take a look at your goals to figure out how to hold your process in tension with the outcome.
Everything that we want to achieve has a cost, be it energetically, monetarily or relationally, and it is only by keeping the cost of those goals in mind that you can become okay with holding things in tension. By finding and expressing gratitude for what you have in the present, noticing and changing your language around what you are doing and stepping back and navigating your hopeful outcomes, you can stop putting the false promise of arrival on a pedestal.
Who do you think would benefit from the questions asked in this episode? Tag them in the comments and share your story with us in the comments on the episode page!
On Today's Episode
- Understanding the problem with setting goals and the cost of achieving them (14:00)
- Ways to achieve a healthy tension between the process and the outcome (15:30)
- How to stay grateful for what is going on in the present moment (18:30)
- What to do when you realize your process is not working for you (24:40)
- The importance of changing your language around what you are doing (26:20)
Quotes
“I think sometimes there is this idea that we will find that thing, that feeling, that state when we get that thing. And often this causes problems for a bunch of reasons.” (13:32)
“We can hold these things in tension so that it is not ‘either this or either that’, but how can we see the nuance.” (16:11)
“Here is the one thing I know: change is inevitable. Meaning, we might achieve the thing, we might arrive, we might have finally made it, how long is that going to last? I don’t know. It might last forever, it likely may not.” (18:55)
“Can we hold the process in tension with the outcome? I think so, if we are doing it in a healthy way. And only we get to assess that, is it worth what it’s costing us? And that’s really really important.” (25:44)
“Ultimately, find things to feel content, grateful, happy, joyful about now, even when it is hard, even when things may not be going your way, there is always a lesson in there too.” (29:20)
Resources Mentioned In This Show
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